"your birthday is taking forever."

I should probably feel sorrier for her, but I don't. Today's present prompted that statement from Alaina.

It's a remarkably-not-so-bad-for-a-Monday (especially after spring forward weekend) Day #


This one is an odd shape. I'm not sure what to make of that. It's also flat. My guess was stickers. It just had that kind of feel.

But I was wrong...again.



A.J. was "helping" me take these pictures. I think it was his passive-aggressive way of letting me know that he was hungry and done with me ignoring him. ("Just let me get one more thing done. Just one more minute, A.J.")

I love dyeing eggs. I know it can be a mess, and it takes a considerable amount of patience to dye eggs with small children, but it's fun. And hard boiled eggs are delicious. It helps to just take the whole mess outside. The girls were very excited to see this present, but that's what prompted Alaina's statement. I told her Easter wasn't too far away - in April, after my birthday. Someday she will understand...

As for the rodeo (because I know you're just dying for the rest of the story), it all began like this. Ashlee mentioned (at coffee, I believe) that she wanted new cowboy boots for her birthday. So I said "I've always wanted cowboy boots!" I know, it sounds crazy. But I really have, ever since high school. I just have a thing for boots of any kind. Of course, then it became a thing that we should get boots for our birthdays. Birthdays are way more fun when you can share them with someone, though I'm sure everyone else is sick of us by now! More on the continuing saga of the rodeo tomorrow...

uh...

Apparently blogger dislikes my blog. (Sorry, Ashlee, you can continue to dislike firefox all you like, but internet explorer is doing the same thing to my blog.) Of course, if you are reading this right now, then clearly you aren't having any problems viewing my blog. If, however, you should encounter a blank space where you had hoped to be enlightened by my witty commentary, you can scroll down and find where the posts are organized by date (on the right hand side of the page) and click on the title of the post you'd like to read.

But never fear! Neither wind nor snow...oh wait. (Although I'd like to think I'm at least as reliable as the Postal Service, plus the blog is free, nor is it junk mail or bills.) It will take more than technical difficulties to keep me from my blogging duties!

As I'm certain my tangents have borne tangents by this point, I'll get on with it.

It's Day #


It's floppy. Alaina guessed a book. Jadyn guessed a window. My guess was a comic book. I had comic books on the brain. We watched a little of Spiderman on tv last night. I just don't like it. (Are you shocked?) That led to a discussion of why Joe prefers Batman or Spiderman over Superman and the differences between the characters. (He likes them because a normal person could theoretically be either one of them. There's no hope for magically becoming the Last Son of Krypton.) The conclusion we came to, which is obviously the answer, was that girls don't like Spiderman as much because Mary Jane is totally codependent, which is obnoxious. Lois Lane, on the other hand, can totally hold her own and is basically on equal footing with Superman/Clark Kent (at least in more recent incarnations). I also personally think that the Bruce Wayne and Clark Kent identities are far more interesting and less annoying than Peter Parker.

Um, sorry about that. We really do have those kinds of conversations. I told you we were nerds. You've been warned.

But here's my cool present! It's butterfly rub-on transfers! (My correct guess percentage gets more dismal everyday.) The one on the top right that you can't really see is a blue morpho, which is my favorite. One of the best things about Houston is the Butterfly Pavilion at the Houston Museum of Natural Science. If you haven't been, let me know. We'll plan a trip. Seriously.

Obviously, the writing mood I'm in today would allow me to continue on for days jabbering about nonsense. I don't think anyone needs that, so I'll depart with this: I'm going to the rodeo next Monday. Close your mouth, you'll catch a fly. But don't worry, there will be more to come regarding this event.

I love birthday month!

Before I get to the 30 Rock Tour present of the day, I have to share this:


Isn't it beautiful?!? I know, I have a depth of field problem (at least, I think that's what the problem is) in this picture, but I'm pretty sure I would have been lynched had I fussed around taking pictures of this cheesecake rather than letting everyone have a piece. This is the very first plain cheesecake I have ever made, and it turned out beautifully. And not only did it look good, it tasted amazing. I mentioned before that I'm better at baking than cooking because I'm better at things that require precision. This is Alton Brown's cheesecake recipe. That may not mean anything to you, but if there is anyone more concerned with precision than I am, it would be him. Plus his show amuses me. The really great thing is that this cheesecake wasn't even hard to make. I still have a few pieces left, so if you really want some and can make it to my house today, you can have one.

Now back to our regularly scheduled 30 Rock Tour.

Just in case you were getting a little bored, today's present will shake things up!



Okay, so maybe not that much. But it is in a bag instead of being wrapped! Unfortunately, that also means I don't have any guesses for your entertainment.



Hot chocolate mix! Yum! And do you see the tiny whisk? It's so cute!

Sorry, better now. But I do love the tiny whisk.

I always was a pattern matcher...

I'm sensing a theme...

It's the first palindrome day of the 30 Rock Tour!

Day #


This one is a book. There's no doubt about it.


There's something familiar about this present...

I love it! Cookies are definitely my thing. I mentioned before that I didn't cook much when I was growing up. Well, chocolate chip cookies were the one thing I did make.

Alaina already read through the whole cookbook. (By the way, when did she learn how to read so well?!?)

It's a big day for us, so I won't be able to extemporize for long...I'm making cheesecake today, wish me luck! Jadyn still hasn't finished picking up toys...wish her luck!

milestones

Do you remember when you turned 10? I do. I was in fourth grade. I specifically remember a conversation I was having with my friend Sabrina as we walked up the stairs at our elementary school with the rest of the class, on our way back to class from PE or music or something. I was about to turn 10, and we were discussing how it was a big deal because it's a two-digit number.

That was twenty years ago. I have a hard time trying to fathom that.

Where did that come from? Well, it's birthday month, I'm blogging about birthdays, and today is Day #



You do the math.

Speaking of math, this means I'm 1/3 of the way through the 30 Rock Tour. That's a little sad for me. I mean, who wouldn't be thrilled to spend every day of their lives opening a present from a friend?

Okay, I'm finished with sentimentality. On with the presents!

There is only one word to describe today's gift: bumpy. Seriously. That was the only thing I could come up with. And the girls weren't allowed to guess because they were picking up toys. I know, I'm horrible. Jadyn is still working on picking up toys and may be until bedtime. We'll see.

I'm fairly certain there was an ulterior motive behind this present.



I just laughed when I opened it. In a good way, of course.

Every year at Christmas, the girls (Tami, Lisa, Ashlee, and I, and now my daughters, and soon Addi) all set aside at least half a day for our annual Baking Extravaganza. The items on the baking agenda vary from year to year, but chocolate-dipped pretzels are always on the list. Two years ago, Ashlee found Christmas tree pretzel molds. So now we have Santas and reindeer to go with them! Do you see that ridiculous picture, though? Who on earth decorates chocolate-dipped pretzels that intricately? Don't worry, Lisa, we'll be sticking to the plain chocolate and sprinkles method! (It seems like Lisa usually ends up being in charge of the children and the pretzel dipping...and the sprinkles.)

I love Christmas. It's the only time of year better than my birthday.

I don't know how well you can make out this picture, but I had to post it in self-defense. See, bumpy. You wouldn't have guessed either.

stumped

Welcome to Day #


We have a major day today, so I was threatened that I had better blog before we go. (Because, really, I have nothing else to do to get all of us out of the house on time. I'm kidding. I was already planning on blogging before we left because otherwise I probably wouldn't get to it until tonight. And how could I leave my tremendous audience in such suspense?)

Yeah, so this one was totally a mystery. It seemed as if there was more than one item, but there was no discernible shape or even a consistent squishiness throughout (I'm sorry, I just could not think of real word to describe it). Like I said, stumped. Or if you prefer, stymied. ("I hate that word. I hate that feeling!" If you can tell me where the quote comes from, I will send you cookies. Sorry, sibs are ineligible.)

If by any chance you have navigated through the tangents to make it to this point, I will finally reveal the contents of the mystery gift!



Animals!

Okay, not really, but that's what I first thought when I opened it. And that's funny, given the dichotomy of the present givers - Ashlee adores her world without animals, and I don't think Lisa has ever met an animal she doesn't like. I think Tami and I fall somewhere in the middle of that spectrum.

The girls wanted to know if I was going to share the candy. I told them maybe. The butterfly is a magnet. Isn't it cute?

Ever since I got my new refrigerator, I have stubbornly refused to put magnets on it. It's just too pretty, even though now it sports dents courtesy of my toy-wielding son. The kids got a set of Magnetic Poetry for Kids for Christmas, and they were lucky they were allowed to put that on the refrigerator. (But I've always thought Magnetic Poetry was cool, so we all played and my refrigerator OCD was not terribly offended.)

So the butterfly found a home on the message board next to the front door. I haven't actually written a message on it in a while...any suggestions?



Doesn't that just give you a "happy spring" feeling?!

happy square root day!

As big of a nerd as I am, I didn't make that up. Seriously, my mom sent out an email linking this article. I'm a little skeptical. Sounds to me like mathematicians and other nerds just wanted more excuses to throw nerd parties. But it's not as if there's any food that really goes with square root day. (Just wait until Pi Day! Then you're going to wish you lived near me!)

Besides being square root day, it's also Day #


(Incidentally, a number without a whole square root...)

This one stands up! (As I'm sure you gathered.) My guess was a cup. Alaina, wising up to these things, guessed a candle. Jadyn said something along the lines of "a sticky thing that you stick things in." I don't make these things up.



I was right! (For those keeping score, that would be 2 out of 8, or 1 for 4, or a solid .250 batting average.) Okay, it's technically a travel mug, but I was close enough.

But did you see how cute it is? The insert is fabric, and the initial is embroidered. I love it! And now I have my own travel mug! (We have something like 4, but they're all Joe's for taking apple juice in the car on the way to work.) I can guarantee my won't be carrying apple juice!

Isn't birthday month great?!?

here I am to save the day!

Yes, I have a minor obsession with superheroes. (Another thing that may not be psychoanalyzed, so back up off!)

Sorry, I may be a little punchy today. This is the first greater-than-5-minute period in which A.J. has been awake and not screaming at me.

This is the thing about having babies that I always seem to forget and have to relearn each time. I like to have a general idea and plan for the day - what we're going to get done when. I'm not an obsessive planner by any means, but I like to have a goal. And then there are those days when the baby just will not be put down, or one of the older ones is sick, or something. So you just have to roll with the punches and try not to be depressed that the house (and by extension, life) is sinking further into a pit of entropy. (Okay, that was a little dramatic. But you get the idea.)

But now I've had a Runza for lunch (a necessity for the psychological boon, but sad they can't freeze the fries with such success), and so it's on to blogging! (Which is clearly a more important task than dishes or laundry or somesuch rot.)

And today marks a week of the 30 Rock Tour! Day #


Smallish, but bigger than the stationery gift, and squishy but not soft. Alaina's guess was a book, which incidentally was the same as my guess.

We were sort of correct!



A cookbook! And not just any cookbook, a breakfast cookbook! I love making breakfast, especially for dinner. Eggs, cheese, and potatoes are easily three of my favorite foods. So I hope the person who chose this cookbook is prepared to have breakfast for dinner on a Friday in the near future! Alaina and I found some good recipes already.

But there was one more thing in the package.



Recipe cards! As soon as I saw them (and they are very cute, for the record), I was reminded of one night when we were at the McCools' house, and Ashlee had asked Debbie for one of her recipes. Debbie agreed, but has this rule that whoever asks for a recipe has to write it down themselves. I don't clearly remember the reasoning, though I'm sure it was sound, but that scene has just stuck in my head. I have a couple of Debbie's recipes that I had to copy myself too.

The other thing that is sort of amusing to me about this gift in general is that when I was growing up, I wasn't much of a cook. My mom always said that if a kitchen used beakers and graduated cylinders and other laboratory instruments I'd do a lot better. She's probably right because I'm not much of a cook (aside from recipes), but I'm very comfortable with baking, which requires specificity and employs lots of chemistry. Besides, who needs dinner when there's cookies? And cheesecake? And brownies? And a million other things? And now, I'm thrilled to get a cookbook and recipe cards...nuts!

birthday month begins!

It's the first day of March! Welcome to birthday month!

I felt like I did so much complaining about softball yesterday that I needed to post some pictures about the good parts of the day. It was still windy as all get out during the good parts, but what are you gonna do?

I think this might have been Jared's favorite part of the whole day. Well, this and the candy. See, this makes it a totally legit parade - there was a fire truck leading it!



Here was her first at bat of the season. Her swing looks decent. Joe thinks if she could've connected, she would've hit a good one. I still can't believe how old and how big she is.



Oh, right. Besides being the first day of March, it's also Day #


Did you think I had forgotten?

In the comments on my last post, Ashlee figured there was no chance of me guessing today's present, as I had a hard time guessing yesterday's. She was correct. It seemed to be about the right shape and size to be pens, but it didn't feel quite like pens. But that was my best guess, so I went with it.

It turned out to be better than pens! (And that's saying a lot because I really love pens!)



Beads! And buttons!

A couple of years ago, I was searching for soccer beads so that I could make soccer earrings. (I know, I know. Give me a break. I have four kids, and I drive a minivan.) I didn't find any, so I free-form beaded some wire in a spiral shape to look like a soccer ball. I don't have a picture, but I thought they looked cool. But now I have actual soccer ball beads! (And baseballs, basketballs, and footballs!) I'm brainstorming ways to use them already...

30 Rock Tour, weekend edition

Day #


has been eventful. Today was Opening Day of softball, which includes a parade and all sorts of happenings besides an actual game. So we were out of the house early(ish) this morning, and I didn't get a chance to open my present until this afternoon. (I know you were all on pins and needles in suspense!)

True confessions: I felt a little dumb after I opened #5 for not having guessed what it was. I don't know, but I'm going to blame the lack of mental acuity on softball. (Don't get me wrong, I love softball, and I love enabling my children to participate in these things, but wow. You should spend a Saturday with us someday. You would undoubtedly be convinced of my insanity.)

Then again, Alaina guessed that it was socks. ("You're talkin' gibberish." I think I need to pull that movie out.)

So what was the mysterious gift?



A pretty purple candle!

I have no doubt set a precedent of regaling you with witty anecdotes with some connection to the gift I received. Sorry. It's not going to happen today. I mentioned softball, right? And the sick children?

The candle smells like lavender, for those who were curious. I love it!

"that's how old I am!"

Which can only mean that it is Day #


And I guessed it today!

I was very proud of myself.

Let's see if you can guess.

It was small, about 4 inches by 6 inches and an inch (maybe less) thick. It was squishy, but not like a shirt.

Any guesses?

Well, I suppose I didn't guess the entire contents, to be fair. The girls snuck a surprise in there.

Here's the thing I didn't guess:


Initial post-its! In purple! Aren't they cute?

And I'm going to use them. My trouble is that I'm a hoarder. I like to save things that I love. I don't know what I'm saving them for, really. But it applies to everything, and I've been doing it since I was little. I can distinctly remember saving the best of my Halloween candy for literally months (because, of course, you eat the stuff you like least first). I think it's something about wanting things I love to last as long as possible. (Lisa and/or any other psych majors out there, you are not allowed to psychoanalyze me!) I'm pretty sure I can blame it on at least one of my parents. My dad stashes things like you would not believe. In fact, it's a familial trait.

Anyway, back to the birthday present!

Did you figure it out? It's stationery! And check it out:


It has my name on it! I think every girl needs personalized stationery. If you don't have some, I will get you some at the next gift-giving opportunity. Seriously. Just find some clever way to let me know that you don't have any. Or just come right out and say it, doesn't matter to me!

I have received personalized stationery as a gift at different points in my life. The first time was when I was 5 or 6. I'm not sure when exactly, but I was old enough to write. Anyway, it was lined letterhead that said "from Amber Lulla" with a cartoon drawing of a little girl writing a letter. I am pretty sure I still have a few sheets. (I told you I was a hoarder.)

The second time was for my high school graduation. A family friend from church gave all of the graduating senior girls personalized note cards. I love these note cards. My first name is embossed on the front. And yes, I still have some!

When we ordered our wedding invitations, we ordered matching thank you notes with our first names on the front. They are vellum with two purple butterflies. I like them, of course, since I picked them out. There's a story about the day I went to order wedding invitations. But I'll save that for another day - it's a very rainy story.

I could be wrong, but I'm guessing there's a story behind this present. As in, where did it come from and how was I not told about this?!?

and now, the moment you've all been waiting for...

Day #

Ashlee thought it would be fun if I tried to guess what was in each one before I opened it. The thought actually crossed my mind yesterday, so I readily agreed.

Here is the paraphrased transcript of my thoughts:

{It's heavy...kind of like a book. It could be a book. Seems too heavy for a picture frame or photo album. I think it's a book or...photo coasters.}

End transcript. Are you in awe of the inner workings of my mind? You should be.

Now I'll bet you'd like to know what was actually in the bag. Or you may not care. But if you don't care, I'm pretty sure you have vowed not to visit my blog for at least the next month and aren't reading this anyway!

So without further adieu...


OH! Do you grasp the significance of this beautiful purple package?!?

Here, let me point out the most relevant details:

and:


I have a little story to tell you. I must admit that I am not the world's biggest fan of m&m's. Well, more accurately, I wasn't the world's biggest fan of m&m's. I mean, the peanut ones were good, and the peanut butter ones were good; I was just never addicted to them. And then these marvelous confectionery creations appeared in stores. They were originally released in conjunction with one of the new Star Wars movies (not even worth getting into that), with some sort of marketing slogan about going to the dark side. Clever enough. They only came in the little bags, and I don't mean the little big bags. I mean the little bags that you find in the checkout aisle. At first, we only found the plain variety. And those were good, don't get me wrong. But then, on a day that will go down in the history books (or maybe not, as I have no idea what day it was...I could maybe figure out the year with some strenuous mental calculations) someone found the peanut variety! I honestly don't remember who it was.

Of course, as these things go, just about as soon as we discovered the wonder that is dark chocolate peanut m&m's, they disappeared. (Remember the part about them being linked with the Star Wars movie? Yeah. Movie done, candy done.) Then again, maybe it was Ashlee who discovered them because apparently things she discovers and loves get discontinued.

A tragedy of such proportions requires action! So we sent emails to m&m's. Again, as these things go, they listened to Ashlee but not to me and about a year later, dark chocolate m&m's (plain and peanut) triumphantly returned!

If you'd like, you can submit my history of dark chocolate peanut m&m's to wikipedia. It couldn't possibly be anymore ridiculous than some of the stuff that ends up on there.

By the way, there is a proper way to eat m&m's. (Warning: nerd alert.) Any guesses why you must eat all of the colors besides red, yellow, and blue first and then ensure the correct numbers of those three colors so that you can eat one of each color together? I've been doing this since high school.

and behind door #2...

Welcome to day #2 of the 30 Rock Tour!


Instead of wisely using this time during which the baby is sleeping to clean something or do something similarly productive (or even eating breakfast), I am blogging. Because I can. (And I don't know how long he will sleep - I'm pretty sure this is a trauma-induced nap brought about by a visit to the doctor which included vaccines. But at least he doesn't have an ear infection. He does, however, have allergies. And what can you do about allergies for a 4 month old? That's right, zippo.)

Have I kept you in enough suspense yet?

Can you guess what I got? Here are some clues.

I got something for day #2 that I've never had before. It fits in my purse. (I already put it there!) It's cute. It's little. It has purple on it (my favorite color).

Any ideas?

I should clarify. I've had several of these in my lifetime, but never a cute little one that would fit in my purse.

The first one I had was blue and had a bear head for the handle. I think it had hearts on it. I loved it. There's a decent chance it's still in the closet in my parents' house. I got it when I was in kindergarten. In fact, I still love it! But even it would not fit in a purse.

Have you figured it out yet?

Have I ever told you about the rain boots my mom sent me my freshman year of college? There's not much need for rain boots in Omaha. Snow boots are necessary, of course, but it just doesn't rain in quantities that would call for rain boots. Or if it is raining that much, you'd better be inside because there's probably a tornado or a chance of a tornado accompanying it. So I moved to Houston for college and was soon acquainted with the subtropical climate. I think it was October, and it rained for a week. Literally. I wasn't entirely sure what to do with that, but I quickly learned that I needed a rain coat and rain boots in order to get to my classes. I didn't have an umbrella either, but a rain coat with a hood is much easier to deal with than an umbrella when traveling from class to class. So my mom sent me a red rain coat and bright yellow rain boots! I love these boots. I still have them and occasionally get to wear them. They're the kind of boots that require you to splash in puddles. Seriously. They're fabulous.

So have you guessed yet? (Hint: the above tangent was also a clue.)

Ta-da!


Isn't it cute and little?! Thanks girls! I love it!

on the first day of the 30 Rock Tour...

my good friends gave to me
a VeggieTales calendar!


So last night, Joe and I were watching 24, which we had recorded, of course. It's 9:35, and there is a knock at the door. Knowing that only crazy people knock on the door at that hour and that we are somewhat suspicious people by nature, Joe answers it. On the doorstep sits a giant box, wrapped with a bow on top. He stands there for a moment, looks around the corner, and says, "It's for you." So I went to the door, and there stand Ashlee, Tami, and Lisa, surrounding the giant box.

Did you know that today begins the 30 day countdown until my 30th birthday? I didn't. My friends did. So what did they bring me?



A giant box of toilet paper!


Not really. It is actually full of presents with numbered sticky notes! And today was day number one.


And this present proves just how well my friends know me. . . first that I get a VeggieTales calendar every year and second that I hadn't gotten one this year.

Now all of you get to celebrate 30 days of my birthday with me!

In other news, the children and I got to have lunch with my mom today during her layover on her way back from California. We ate at Godfather's Pizza. Did you know that in second grade I was friends with the son of the CEO of Godfather's Pizza? Well, I was.

In other other news, at least 2, maybe 3 out of 4 children have ear infections. Awesome.

dirty little secrets

There are a few things no one ever tells you about having a baby (and no, none of these are things I'm figuring out for the first time).

1. Your hair may start falling out after the baby is born. By the handfuls. It's gross. It gets everywhere. (It will come back, but you will start to wonder just how much hair can fall out.)

2. In the beginning, breastfeeding hurts. Like nothing you can imagine.

3. You will feel schizophrenic or bipolar or something. Somehow you have to achieve a balance of patience and calm during the times you have to feed or rock or otherwise entertain the baby and then find the motivation and opportunity to work as fast as you can during the brief periods of time the baby is sleeping or content to get as much done as possible.

4. You will probably only find any time to yourself if you forgo sleep.

I know it sounds like it, but I'm really not complaining. I'm actually pretty good at dealing with reality. But sometimes you step back and look at it and wonder at the reality.

pop quiz

image by Paul Carlson, from http://sprott.physics.wisc.edu/fractals.htm

What spreads farther, faster, and more insidiously than a virus?

(Because I want to be Ashlee when I grow up, I may just send out a prize for the correct and/or most creative answer.)

seriously?

I'm sorry, but it has to be said.

I have no strong feelings either way about tattoos. I personally would probably never get one, but I don't have a problem with them out of hand. Rather, I just feel that they are not as counter-cultural as some people who get them believe them to be or want them to be. Honestly, it seems to me that tattoos have become downright trendy. (Don't hate me, it's just my opinion from my observation of society.) Here is my proof. Sorry, I couldn't get a picture to load. It's "Barbie Totally Stylin Tattoos." Enough said.

ya gotta be quick!

I'm officially the worst mother ever.

Wednesday night, I (along with my semi-permanent arm accessory) went to dinner with the girls (Ashlee, Tami, and Lisa) for Lisa's birthday dinner. We went to BJ's, it was great! Anyway, this left Joe in charge of the other three children. (They played "Wii!" as Jared informed me the next morning.) So Joe texted me while I was at dinner, informing me that Alaina's tooth, which she had been messing with for a good 4 days, fell out. I texted him back to let him know that I would take care of it when I got home. Well, as it turns out, A.J. has been sick again this week (the weather has gone nuts again), and when he is sick, he refuses to be put down. So when I got home, my primary concern was to quiet him down so we could both get some sleep. Needless to say, I completely forgot about being the Tooth Fairy...until about 7am the next morning as the children were about to get up.

Naturally, I waited to see what Alaina would say. It was something along the lines of a shocked, "The tooth fairy didn't come!" This, of course, required some quick thinking on my part. So in case anyone ever asks, the Tooth Fairy occassionally takes a day off...and makes up for it with two quarters the next night.

just call me Sir Edmund

I wanted to post a picture of Jared's new haircut. But he wouldn't cooperate last night, deciding instead to stick out his chubby little hand and maul the camera lens. (Joe cleaned it, so no harm done.) So here is today's random photo:



Baby smiles make it all worth it.

I did something last Friday that I have not done before. I took all of the children out on a shopping expedition. For most, going to Target is a simple errand - run in, wander around for a while, run out, done. Nothing to write home about. Not so for us! It requires logistical analysis, pit stops, and crisis-aversion skills. Alaina pushes the stroller with A.J., and I put Jared and Jadyn in the cart and push it. (Child containment is the #1 strategy.) Two bathroom stops later, we finish shopping and have to stop for lunch. This kind of shopping trip demands nourishment. We did make it, and we got everything we needed with a minimum of behavioral issues, so it was a success. However, I don't believe I will be making a habit of it anytime soon.

I've decided that Jared compensates for his limited vocabulary through sheer repetition. Have you ever read the book Jacob Two-Two? Well, this is more like Jared Six-Six. I mean, what's the difference, really? As long as you're jabbering away nonstop all day long, who can tell that you don't say that many words? The entire time we were at lunch at Target, all I heard was, "Mama! More b's! Mama! More b's!" A "b," of course, is the generic term for any letter.

We're rearraging our office upstairs. My family can attest to the fact that it was out of control. The trouble is, boys don't stay out of anything. It's a harsh realization to which I've had to adjust. When the girls were little, they typically stayed out of stuff. They didn't bother things that they knew weren't theirs. Jared, on the other hand, wanders around the house looking for things to get into. We have a big chair and a half with an ottoman upstairs, and out of necessity, it is situated next to the railing. The girls have always been careful to sit in it after I told them they could fall out an hurt themselves if they stood. I'm fairly certain Jared has taken to standing in the chair more after I told him the same thing. So, of course, the chair must be moved. As is often the case, this cannot be accomplished until 20 other things have been done in order to have a place for the chair to move into. Have I mentioned that we're going to be looking for a bigger house?!?

miscellany

I have decided blog posts are much more interesting if there is a photo included. So, here is today's photo:


It has nothing to do whatsoever with this post, but it's cute.

I have been completely remiss in mentioning this, but my mom started a blog. Seriously. I posted way back when about how I thought my parents were cool, and so she went and proved it again. It all reminds me of the time I called my grandma and she asked me to hold on because she was on the other line. Technology is way out of control.

The conversation I had with Jadyn this morning:

Me: Jadyn, you can't wear that sweater, it's too warm today.

Jadyn: But I love it!

Me: I understand that, but it's too warm today for a sweater.

Jadyn: But I love my sweater.

Me: (getting a little sterner) Jadyn, you may not wear that sweater today.

She bursts out crying. But there are no tears, so it's really more whining.

Me: Are you seriously crying about the weather?!

Jadyn: (wailing) Yeah!

I'm not sure how she thought she could get away with that in this house...


There's more, I'm just out of time, so it'll have to wait for the next post and random picture.

Oh, and happy birthday Lindsey! :)

inconceivable!

Although it is not even possible, my baby is about to be 6. A two-hands number. I remember being 6 - not vividly, but I remember some of the things I thought and felt. Anyway, enough nostalgia. On to the party!

She asked for a Nutcracker party. (What can I say, she's my kid, it's not a real surprise she's obsessed with Christmas.) I told her there was no way I was doing a Nutcracker cake. I know my limits. So we agreed on Sugar Plum Fairy cupcakes. Believe it or not, it's not all that easy to find ballerina cupcake toppers. So I got creative.


I made tiny gingerbread men out of a thin layer of cake. The tops of the cupcakes are supposed to be the ballerina's skirt. I thought they were cute. I bought a decorator tip set in order to make them, which I'm kind of excited about. Undoubtedly my next endeavor will be more involved.

As it was a Nutcracker party, she directed a meaningful new interpretation of the ballet, in which she also performed the role of, you guessed it, the Sugar Plum Fairy. So that Joe doesn't take my blog away, I will refrain from posting video. (He had a supporting role. Literally.) Jared helped with the scenery.


And then there were presents. Ashlee won.


She's holding her brand new leotard. It's purple with butterflies. Don't believe Ashlee when she tells you she had to buy it for her because I would not. As predicted, though, Jadyn wants one too.

So, here comes 6!

what is it with men and "the godfather?"

Seriously, what is it about children and cat litter that they must intersect at some point?

A couple of years ago, when Alaina and Jadyn were in the vicinity of 3 1/2 and 1 1/2 years old, respectively, the two of them decided to hunt for treasure. . . in the cat litter. But they weren't just digging in the cat litter. No, they were throwing handfuls of the stuff. And as the cat litter is located in the laundry room, they managed to get cat litter not only all over themselves and firmly ground into their hair, but also inside the washer and every other corner of the laundry room. It was gross. Fortunately, they were the only two children at the time, so cleaning them up wasn't major drama.

This morning, when now there are four children, Jared decided it would be a good idea to spread the cat litter from the laundry room into the hallway. Now, I will admit that it was nothing short of a miracle that he wasn't chucking the stuff as hard and as far as he could. He was, however, taking handfuls of cat litter and dropping it all over the laundry room floor and hallway carpet. But it gets better. After removing him and disciplining him and washing his hands, I sent him into my room with the other children so I could go get the vacuum from downstairs. During the 30 or so seconds it took me to go downstairs and retrieve the vacuum, Jared had gone into the master bath, where one of the cats currently lives (long story, not worth it) and picked up the cat litter scoop to play in the cat litter in there. I'm thinking, "Seriously?!? I just spanked him for that!" So once again I removed him and disciplined him and washed his hands, but this time I sat him down against a wall where I could watch him while I cleaned up the mess.

Stay tuned. I'm sure A.J. will have his own exploits with cat litter in a couple of years. . .

what's the "call in sick" number for my job?

All I wanted to do when I woke up this morning was not talk. My throat hurt, I was coughing, and I felt awful. I knew I'd have to deal with the world; I just didn't want to have to talk to it.

And then they woke up.

terrible

I am officially a terrible mother.

For her birthday, Ashlee (I would link to her, but even if I can do that from my phone, it wouldn't be easy) took Jadyn out for a special day. Part of the special day was getting to pick out her own present. Jadyn selected a truly delightful baby doll that makes noise - sucks its pacifier, cries, etc. Fortunately for Ashlee and Jadyn and the doll, it also has a "magic blanket" that quiets the crying instantly.

This afternoon, Jared was playing with this particular baby doll. (He has taken an interest in baby dolls since his baby brother was born.) He put the pacifier in the baby's mouth, but it kept falling out, which made the baby cry. After several attempts at pacifying the baby, Jared just busts out crying. As I'm trying to discern just what has happened, he keeps trying to make the baby stop crying. I can't help but start laughing. The poor kid was so upset that the baby wouldn't stop crying that he has big fat tears rolling down his cheeks (which, of course, makes me laugh harder). I enlist Alaina's help in retrieving the magic blanket from upstairs, as I have my hands full with the aforementioned baby brother.

So we get the baby doll quiet, which helps Jared to calm down. And then the baby starts up, and so does Jared. I am still laughing and hoping this won't be the foundation for a neurosis.

So what have we learned? a) Jared can be a sweet and sensitive boy. b) Crying baby dolls can have their moments as entertainment. c) I probably need to get out of the house more often.

"Jared thinks all the food in the world is his."

- Jadyn, in the car this morning on the way to Alaina's basketball game, as Jared is screaming incoherently about wanting something I neither understand nor could possibly give to him while driving

"Why are you laughing?"

- Jadyn's next remark, to me

a blogging resolution

So, not really. I don't do resolutions. But I am trying something new...blogging from my phone. It's an attempt to blog more frequently, as I know all 2 of my readers are eager for more wit and wisdom from me.

Anyway, blogging from my phone might actually work as it is very conducive to multi-tasking, and while I don't often have an empty lap for my computer, I can usually manage unoccupied thumbs. (I may finally be able to keep up with Ravi at texting.)

I am truly amazed somedays at the difference between being pregnant and not for me. But it's the little things like actually getting something done during the day and feeling like I'm accomplishing something rather than merely surviving that support our decision to be done at four. I'm also fairly confident that each child would not get as much attention as I want them to if we had more.

So we're looking at bigger houses. I know, Ashlee, I said I wasn't moving unless it was out of this state. Well, I changed my mind. I don't really understand how or when it happened, but we've run out of room. I don't really feel like we have an excessive amount of stuff, but apparently the house disagrees. And wouldn't you know it, I'm actually getting excited about the prospect. The idea of having a space for all of my craft stuff and room for our books and a classroom for school nearly makes me giddy. And why else do we have four kids if not to help clean the house?

I've just discovered the most amazing thing about homschooling: seeing Alaina learn something and incorporate concepts she's learned into learning new things. She's learned how to read, for crying out loud. She can write in cursive, and she's developed good problem solving skills (when she chooses to employ them!). It really is amazing to observe firsthand. I know homeschooling isn't for everyone, but I am so glad that we can.

So, any brilliant thoughts on how to do a Nutcracker birthday party?

mile marker 16

I've always felt sorry for people whose birthdays were around Christmas. I mean, how could they possibly not feel gypped? But I've changed my mind since my children were born, as they all have birthdays basically during the holidays. Now I feel like we essentially have one unending party from the end of October (A.J.'s birthday, not Halloween) through the end of January. It's great fun, but it's also a bit of a marathon to plan and execute. I'm not complaining, as planning and organizing is what we OCD types love to do.


One of the events during party season is our annual "Bible Study Baking Extravaganza!" (Yes, that's its actual name. Don't ask me, I don't make this stuff up.) It was started by a dear friend who has since abandoned us for the midwest, but we're not bitter or anything. Baking Day has since evolved a bit, but I'm thankful that we always make the time for it. I'm also very thankful for my friends who are so patient and willing to work with my small(ish) children, even though I know it is not easy! (Have you ever tried cooking or baking with small children? If they don't drive you bananas asking every 3 minutes when it will be time to frost the cookies, then there's the mess.) But my friends are champs and good sports about the whole thing.


Speaking of bananas, as my mom always said, "what goes around comes around." The other night, after asking for a banana and eating half of it, Jared decided that the way I had peeled the bottom half of the banana was simply unacceptable. So he dropped it on the floor. And then, in the midst of his tantrum, I told him to pick up the banana and throw it in the garbage. When I looked back at him a moment later to ensure that he was doing as instructed (as there are three other children and this was not the only thing taking place at that time), I see him noticing a convenient banana-stashing nook under the hutch and beginning to take advantage of said nook. The following things flew through my head almost simultaneously, the last being the one that actually left my mouth:

- Ha! That's hilarious!*
- Where's the camera?
- Wow, it must be genetic or something.*
- Jared Robert! Pick up that banana right now!

*There may be an anecdote about Raj and me and a not-so-silent fruit consumption protest involving stashing a banana under a hotel room bed in India. First of all, it was hilarious, and second of all, I was not going to eat that banana.

Up next: a Clarice birthday party for Jadyn, who couldn't possibly be 4 already, as I'm certain Alaina just turned 4 the other day; a Christmas here and there; some family coming; other assorted events.

gonna walk all over you

"These slippers are made for walking, Mama. ... My slippers are made for walking."

So says Jadyn.

It's a wonder what 7 hours of uninterrupted sleep in one's own bed can do for a person...

a source of frustration eliminated

For a few years now, I have harbored a death wish towards my dishwasher. But it was just one of those things I accepted. It was getting old, it was installed when the house was built, and I didn't pick it out. (Implication: The person who did pick it out had inferior opinions.) However, when it started to not clean the dishes, that's when I wanted to throw it out the window.

If there is one thing I learned from my dad, it is the art of being patient. Though Joe may be snorting as he reads this, I really can be patient. I might be loud and opinionated while exercising said patience, but I can do it. So here's to the practice of patience:


Oh, yeah. I may have sold my soul to Samsung and/or Lowe's. What are you gonna do?

who knew?

It's actually possible there is one decent writer on the staff of SNL. This aired Saturday night, and oddly enough, was pulled from the official NBC SNL site...possibly because there's actual truth in it. But it's funny, so here you go (for as long as it manages to stay on youtube).

addicted

So we just spent the last 5 days without phone, tv, or internet.

It's brutal.

I didn't mind being without the phone; after all, that's what cell phones are for. And usually the phone only rings when telemarketers are calling, so it's not like I answer it anyway.

I sort of missed the tv. It was the first week of new shows, but there's not much worth watching anyway. There is something to be said about the utility of Nick Jr. in the morning, though.

I am completely addicted to the internet. I can't decide if this is a bad thing or not. Part of me doesn't care, even if it's not that healthy. But I felt completely cut off from the outside world, which I don't think is a good thing. Then again, maybe it's inevitable...I've been an internet junkie for nearly 15 years now.

why do they name hurricanes?

The answer we gave Alaina was that hurricanes had to have names to distinguish them. I'm beginning to wonder if it doesn't serve a secondary purpose of personifying them in order to facilitate hating them. Or perhaps, to be less hostile, they need names because they take on lives and personalities of their own.

Just for the record, I am very grateful to have had no damage from the hurricane. Nothing. I am also grateful that we had a place to go to, despite the fact that the hurricane was actually worse there and we should've stayed here. I am very impressed by the way the various governments handled this storm - the reality is that things went just about as smoothly as could be expected.

What I said before Ike hit still stands: hurricanes are like high school girls - all drama.

I have experienced a fair amount of weather phenomenon in my life: ice storms, blizzards, tornado warnings (though no actual tornadoes), tropical depressions, and now a hurricane. Hands down, hurricanes are the worst. I could give you all the reasons why, but I won't. Suffice it to say, the weather on the Gulf coast bites, and hurricanes are merely the epitome of the truly awful weather.

By the way, someone please connect the dots for me, because I can't. Obama canceled his appearance on Saturday Night Live last Saturday because of the hurricane. Uh....? Not like 99% of the people affected by the hurricane could watch SNL on Saturday night anyway...

if you're interested...

One of the most well written articles about Sarah Palin and why she is important to this election and to conservatives as a whole comes from, of all places, the Times of London. If you're interested in reading some of the real story as opposed to the absolutely biased drivel (at best) and downright lies (at worst) of the mainstream media, you can find it here.

Why you should vote for John McCain...

2 words:

Sarah Palin.

I hate summer. Have I mentioned that before? Well, I do. I didn't used to. I used to love summer, but that's another story. Mind you, there isn't really a season that I do like in this climate, but I really hate summer. Any guess what the temperature was at 11am this morning? 103. That's right, 103. And that doesn't account for the humidity and therefore the heat index, that was just the temperature. You can't even placate me with the knowledge that September and theoretically fall are on the way. It's a lie. Not the September part, the fall part. Why? Because there is literally no chance that the weather will become bearable, even temporarily, until late October at best. No, the reality is we will still be running the air conditioner in December.

I'm done complaining now. (To be fair, it is my blog.)

In other news, Jared figured out how to turn on the tv in the kitchen with the remote the other day. He thought it was basically the coolest trick ever, giggling all the way into the living room, where, sadly, the same trick didn't work on the tv there...

Alaina has decided she wants to be in a choir, which is, of course cool with me. Anyone know of a children's choir around here? She's also decided she wants to learn to play guitar and be in a band. That may have been slightly influenced by watching us play Guitar Hero...but I still told her to talk to Uncle Raj about it next time she sees him... (Yes, Guitar Hero. Yes, we are nerds. Our children had no chance.)

The Great Toy Standoff of '08 was merely the opening skirmish. It is, in fact, a war...of wills, of stubbornness, of control, of something. But it is decidedly a war. Jadyn literally fell asleep on the bench in the playroom last night because she refused to pick up toys and I refused to let her go to bed or do anything else until she picked them up. The sobering part is that I know this is not really about toys and that I have to win this particular war, for her sake. This parenthood thing is bar none the hardest thing I will ever do in my life.

getting there

This summer has been rough for me. So it is with a sense of relief that I welcome the month of August. I used to love summer. Of course, that was when I lived in a climate where summer was just another season rather than the prevailing weather pattern.

I will give that it could be entirely psychosomatic (August means summer will be ending and therefore things will be changing), but it's getting a little easier to do things. Doing small housework tasks no longer seem comparable to scaling a cliff. I still have next to no desire to cook anything, but I don't really expect that to resolve itself until November. (Nothing like Thanksgiving and the thought of pumpkin dessert month to motivate the cook/baker in me!)

I even feel like I'm getting a handle on the homeschooling thing. I didn't exactly jump into this particular pool completely unaware of the depth, but this has definitely been one of the bigger challenges I have ever taken on. The whole idea of no boundaries and no guidelines is a bit of a double-edged sword. The past nine months have definitely tested my perspective on the philosophy of learning in general.

All I can hope is that this breathing space lasts for a little while. I know it's going to come crashing down soon, but if I could have a couple of months to get things together, I would be doing really well.

love for my bro

My brother Ravi has started a blog. It has taken much persuasion and cajoling, but you should go visit it. Ravi has an interesting perspective on life...you won't be disappointed.

is this what it's going to be like?

Last week, Jadyn spent the better part of 2 days gated in her room. (I let her out to eat, of course.) Ashlee called it the "Great Toy Standoff of '08." The disagreement was about picking up toys in her room - I told her she must, and she refused. So after trying a number of disciplinary methods, I finally told her that she wasn't leaving her room until she picked up her toys. Thus the standoff. She had started to pick up her toys by late afternoon of the 2nd day, but the standoff ended when Joe came home and took matters into his own hands.

The other night, Jared decided he didn't want to eat the last half of his banana and promptly deposited it on the floor. This being an unacceptable behavioral choice, I told him to pick up the banana. As this was not on his list of things to do, he and I disagreed for the next two hours about the placement of the banana. The banana standoff finally ended when I decided that he was far too happy to just play in the 4 square feet of the kitchen to which he was confined and that he would probably fall asleep on the kitchen floor before he would willingly pick up the banana. So I had to make him pick up the banana and throw it away.

I never really saw myself as a stubborn person. I mean, I know that I have my opinions and that I'm pretty certain of the way that I do things, but I never really felt like I'm the type of person who is just stubborn for the sake of stubbornness. And I'm sure if Jadyn or Jared could articulate their motivations, they wouldn't categorize themselves as simply stubborn either. I'm just getting the feeling that this is what it's going to be like - navigating very strong personalities and figuring out how to guide them.

And so it has begun. Sleeping in a chair is bittersweet; while I do appreciate being able to walk when I get up in the morning, it is just not the same as sleeping in a bed.

I have noticed that driving around in a big city late at night is very lonely. Not because there aren't any cars around, rather, because there are a lot of cars around. I understand that this seems counterintuitive, but in my reality, no one is supposed to be out at 11 o'clock at night. (Except, of course, for me and the few other people like me who don't know enough to go to bed.) But in a big city, there are a lot of people driving around, and the city accommodates that; the stoplights and whatnot behaving as they do all day long, with no comprehension of the hour. In a smaller place, on the contrary, people do actually go to bed (or at least have the sense not to leave the house). And the city infrastructure changes in understanding. There's something friendly about the stoplights blinking yellow on my way home, as if to say, "Hey! Goodnight! I'm taking a break too. Go on through, there's no traffic." I suppose this feeling of loneliness is not far removed from the mild depression I feel when the weather fails to consult the calendar, e.g. when I'm running the air conditioner in December.

my poor neglected blog

In order to appease the angry masses as a result of my shameful, though temporary, abandonment of my blog, I submit a cute picture of small children. (Hey, what's the use in having children if you can't use them as cannon fodder every once in a while? Seriously, calm down, it's a joke.)



Every so often I feel like I need to draw back, regroup, take a mental vacation, something. I'm not terribly proud of it, and I'm sure it's an attitude problem more than anything. I just sometimes get sick of all the things that I "have" to do, so I do nothing.

favorite things

It's interesting how different things can trigger memories. Yesterday the small children and I shared a cantaloupe (yes, between us we ate the entire thing) that was really good. I couldn't cut the thing fast enough to keep up with the speed at which they were shoveling the fruit into their mouths. But this cantaloupe was very good - it tasted just like the ones we used to eat at Grandma Jackie's house during the Fourth of July in Iowa (where it's not a little sketchy to buy produce from the farmers selling on the side of the road out of their pickup trucks). I so want to take my kids to small town Iowa for the small town Fourth of July celebrations, which aren't that much to speak of, but they also aren't put on for the show. It's not like I have memories of days that were without their share of drama. I remember it was always either ridiculously hot or raining, and I have no doubt that we were usually a chore to entertain. But I also remember how much fun it was to watch the fireworks, play bingo, watch the parade, and how good the cantaloupe and the watermelon tasted, and how the adults in my family didn't try and entertain us at every moment with this plan or that but let us figure things out for ourselves.

I haven't been to Yale, Iowa, for the Fourth of July celebration in a really long time. I'm sure things have changed, and I'm sure there are plenty of not-delightful things I would notice about small towns and their residents were I to return. But that doesn't change my desire to go back.

The other thing that has stirred memories lately has been a return to using matches. I think I really prefer matches over a firestick. Yes, a firestick may be easier, but there's nothing remarkable about it. Matches have an instantaneous, unmistakable smell associated with lighting them that just reminds me of afternoons after school, going downstairs to do my homework and lighting either a candle or incense from India. Even accounting for the homework, it's a pleasant memory.

so tired

I realized something depressing the other day. I probably won't be able to get back to Omaha until next May or June. That will make it a full year and a half between visits. I know that I probably sound crazy in my inexplicable attachment to a place, but it is what it is. Everything just feels different there. And there are some people who will point out that the drought between visits is largely my own fault, which I acknowledge but reject as a valid argument. :)

Anyway, so a few weeks ago, when my mom was here, I offhandedly remarked that I wanted fried ravioli from Malara's. It's one of those funky little restaurants in the middle of a neighborhood that is just barely converted from a house itself. One of the things this restaurant is famous for is its fried ravioli. It really is amazing. So when we were in Target today trying to figure out what to get for lunch, I stumbled upon a box of frozen fried ravioli. Attempting to contain my excitement, I decided neither the price nor the ingredient list were too appalling and subsequently had fried ravioli for lunch. It didn't even remotely resemble the fried ravioli from Malara's, but it was decent enough, particularly because I have never seen fried ravioli in another restaurant, much less a grocery store.

By way of update, my new washer is amazing. The clothes are actually cleaner, which I had hoped for but never really expected. Things like children's socks, for which there is little hope anyway, have returned to a state of actual whiteness. It is truly a wonder. And so the list of appliances which need to break is down by one...

for the record

I'm just going on record to say that I did not kill the washer. I have wished it dead for some time now, but I did not kill it. However, that does not change the fact that it is dead, which does not bode well for the clothing situation.

I made an amazing discovery the last time I went to the grocery store. Whole Foods has organic tater tots! I know this probably does not seem all that amazing, but really it is. I had some for lunch, with cheese on top, and it was yummy.

conquered! (almost)

I can't say it's been completely conquered until I have successfully done it more than once, but this afternoon I made a really good smoothie, and it made me happy! :) I would even dare to say that it was as good as the one I got from Smoothie King last week.

Just a little update for everyone who I know was very concerned about me and my smoothies.

83

Yes, that is the number of this post. Pathetic, compared to Ashlee's 403. I guess it means that Ashlee is 4 times cooler at blogging than I am.

Does anyone know how to make smoothies? I'm terrible at it, and I really want one. There is a Smoothie King right by my house, but $6 for a smoothie is a little more than I'm willing to pay (unless I'm desperate).

One of the great things about my mom being here was that she just took care of things for me. Like making breakfast for me. I know, it sounds pathetic, but I have been making my own breakfast basically since I was old enough to pour milk. So today when I really wanted eggs but didn't have the stomach to make them myself, there was no one here to make them for me. (Yes, I'm just whining, but it's my blog, so deal with it.)

There's something wrong with my dumb cats. They have never, ever fought with each other. But for some unknown reason, this morning they've decided they don't like each other. It's been the whole thing - growling, hissing, weird cat moaning. I'm thoroughly annoyed. The thing they don't know is that if they start injuring each other, they're both done for. I really do love my cats, but not when they're acting so bizarrely and unpredictably.

happy birthday to me!

Today is my birthday. Is it okay that I don't feel like I'm 29 or act like it seems someone almost 30 should act?