boys are special, reason #111 and #112

So I'm driving home from the Galleria area at 6:00pm tonight. (Enough said, right? It gets better.) I was picking up my sister's and daughter's passports which had been freshly approved and stamped with visas to India. I had Jared and A.J. with me. (Told you it was better.)

Determined to suck it up and deal the best I could, we made it out of the visa office without a trip outside/to the bathroom/wherever for some, um, more stringent discipline. Anyway, we're in the car, sitting in traffic, and Jared is alternating between entertaining me and telling me which way I should be driving. At one point, he starts singing "Twinkle Twinkle," and asks me to sing along. So I do. Then he asks me to sing the Doxology (we've started singing that at bedtime also...long story), so we sang that together too. As soon as we finish, he says, "Okay, time to go to bed now! Going to sleep in the car!" He then closed his eyes and leaned against his headrest, feigning sleep.

Of course I had to play along. "Jared, are you sleeping?"

Without blinking, "Yes!"

A few seconds later, in his delightful yelling voice, "Wake up time!"

After about 30 minutes and 10 miles, I asked him about one of his classmates at Mother's Day Out. I had been tipped off about this particular classmate from my informant.

"Jared, was Aubrey in your class today?"

"No."

Knowing otherwise, I persisted. "Jared, was Aubrey in class today?"

Unintelligible mutterings, then, "Yeah."

Different tactic. "Jared, is Aubrey your friend?"

Without hesitation, "Aubrey's a girl."

Clearly, being a girl disqualifies one from friendship status in Jared's world.