When I was growing up, all the way through high school and into college, I secretly never wanted to pray (as so many adults in church always did) that Jesus would come back soon. I liked my life and I wanted to live. I was happy to live as a Christian and that sort of thing, I just wasn't ready to go to heaven yet. I'm pretty sure that I had an inaccurate view (and still do) of heaven, but it was not something I was interested in yet.
All of that changed...but I'm not sure when. I think maybe when I started being less selfish and more aware of people around me and the pain and suffering we inflict on each other. There are so many beautiful and fun things in this world, but there is so much more pain. It just makes me sad to think of the pain we cause other people and ourselves, especially intentionally. And then to contrast that with the picture of the world the way God created it...that has been enough to change my mind and ask the question of so many before me - how long?
4 comments:
So the question then becomes, what do we do now? What do we do now to help those who have been hurt, or are intentionally hurting others?
Is there anything for us to do?
First, let me say that I'm so glad that your blog has been released from the capitalist iron fist of the jewelry trade.
Second, I know what you mean. In fact, I'm still not sure if I want to pray that. One of my biggest problems is that prayer has always seemed to me to be saying, "Jesus, I'm saved now, it's okay for you to come back." As if everyone else can go to hell. I'm sure for most people it doesn't mean that, but I guess I just have a tendency to read 26 books of the New Testament, and I hope that Jesus will fill me in on what I need to know if I don't get to 27 before I work the other ones out. Now don't get all context police on me. I know that the end of the story is as important as the beginning. It's just a figure of speech. There is so much to do here that I often feel compelled to just play hard until the clock runs out.
i have a hard time with not wanting the religious millennium to come. to me heaven seems like a wonderful place, but i cannot seem to understand how i will ever appreciate its perfection when there is no pain to contrast that too... i'm sure though that God will work that out and my confusions just manifest my current lack of faith.
i recognize all of the pain in the world, but to me it seems worth it. however when the wickedness is increasing and joy is decreasing the balance is bound to tip... so i hope that someday i can wish for heaven as fervently as you do.
Ashlee, I think your question is related to Raj's comment - we do as much as we can for as long as we can. The most we can hope for in this world is to show the love of Christ to people. At least, that's the best that I've figured out to do (not that I always live up to that by any means...)
Raj, I totally get what you mean that that prayer sounds like I'm cool, so go ahead and come back now Jesus. And yesterday I just read the passage (2nd Peter I think) that says that Christ is patiently waiting so that as many as possible may be saved. But I think there's also a passage that says something about praying for Christ's return. I completely agree that we have to play hard until the end - I think that's really what we're here for. I guess what I'm getting at is more a "mourn with those who mourn" kind of thing - it's for the sake of the people who are hurt that I wish for heaven the most. (I don't mean that to sound self-assured or anything, but I really think that's how I view all of this - I want those people to know perfect love.)
Lindsay, that is a good point about not knowing perfection if there's no contrast...I wonder if the lives we spend on earth serve as that contrast. And I don't think confusion is a lack of faith. I've always believed that when I'm questioning things about God (not his existence or salvation, more like character and will) is when I do have faith. I question God because I expect an answer (of some sort, either from God or through a method he chooses). Like I said at the beginning of this post, I honestly used to not want Christ to come back. I never envisioned myself wanting that either, because I felt like it would make me irrelevant to the real world - like I was one of the church supersaints who had no idea what was going on in my life. The funny thing is, I want Jesus to come back now because I am more connected to the real world, and especially to other people.
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